cutsopretty

i should be cleaning the house right now. but i'm not. i'm a laaazy ass. today was my day off but i had to do inventory so once again i worked on a day off. but thankfully aj said he'd work for me on friday so i have the first friday off since before the store opened. :D i sold my soul for coffee.
went to columbia over the weekend with hunter and had a hella good time. it was nice to get the fuck out of augusta and away from target.
fuck work.

rose: have you ever been in love?
desire: YOU MIGHT SAY THAT
horrible isn't it?
IN WHAT WAY?
it makes you so vulnerable. it opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up.
you build up all these defenses. you build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...
you give them a piece of you. they don't ask for it. they do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore.
love takes hostages. it gets inside you. it eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like "maybe we should just be friends" or "how very perceptive" turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart.
HOW PICTURESQUE
it hurts. not just in the imagination. not just in the mind. it's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain.
nothing should be able to do that.
especially not love.

**ripped off of neil gaiman's sandman, by the way

i love it when you take one of those weird turns in life and only one thing was supposed to change but then a whole lot more changed? all i thought would change would be the whole job thing, then i got struck with a frightening sense of the rest of my life. as a result, howie and i decided to take things back a little bit and explore a little bit, so to speak. whether this was a good decision or not remains to be determined.
i need a summer boy. i'll dump him in the fall cause he's my summer boy.

mirrormask was well worth the two hours we spent driving to atlanta. even howie falling asleep on the way back and deciding that his HEAVY arm needed to stay on my shoulder on the whole way back. i am now tempted to do my hair straight up, wayne static style.

down to the last two weeks before the store opens and things are getting a bit... fun. fun of course in the meaning of stressful as hell.
i want a psp.

so howie and chris are on their way back from charlotte right now. they got to meet neil gaiman. but of course once again, work got in the way of life and i had to miss it. but apparently they got some shit signed and showed him the pic of my back and he liked it, so that makes things a bit better. but not much.

dammit i've tried to write an entry three times so far, but when the white screen pops up, i can't think of anything to say. stage fright maybe?
i have become addicted to psp. i'm the last one of the group who doesn't have one (which makes me sad), but howie's nice enough to let me play on his.
that's it for now i think.